Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Krem and Me

Perhaps it is because there are two children needing special attention during these early days that Stacey has developed a special bond with Hirut and Krem and I have a connection that is greater than what I have experienced with any of my other children. But I don't believe that. I think that Krem had a vision of what a father was before we even met, and I am filling that void that he longed for. I do not mean to say that the love between us exceeds that between me and my other children. There are still major challenges as we all get used to the larger family and new personalities. Rather, it is that Krem sees me as "The One". Most parents out there know what I mean when I say mommies are special. The bond between a child and mother is greater, more compassionate, deeper. When hugs are needed, or a knee is scraped, mommy is the one they run to. Those special moments before bed when toddlers fight to keep their eyes open, it is mommy who gives that kiss goodnight. With Krem I am finding out what it feels like to be that person for someone. When we are at the store or park, it is my hand he reaches for to hold. It is me who he wants to read books to him before bed. And these moments are very special - it is clear how much he yearns for this bond. It is clear how much he loves having a daddy. But don't worry River, Forest, Stephanny and Hirut, I still have my special place in my heart for all of you. But I feel great warmth in my heart to know what it feels like to be "the one" for Krem.

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